The Zone

You know that phrase ‘the comfort zone’?  I read something in the last few weeks that really has challenged that concept for me.

I’ve realized that the comfort zone is really a ‘familiar zone’.  It has much more to do with familiar than comfort because often ‘the zone’ can be very uncomfortable.  What ends up being comfortable is ‘the familiar’.

 

The real questions then become:

Is this place of familiar really comfortable?

When I ask myself this, I realize that my answer is that at some level, staying small, which is my familiar zone, is pretty comfortable because in some ways it feels safe to me.

On the other hand, staying small limits me so much that I’m unable to move forward freely toward a life filled with abundance on every level, from having a full practice and business to having a deep and meaningful, intimate relationship with a soul mate.  So no, ultimately my familiar is not comfortable or even sustainable for me in creating the life of my dreams.

 

Am I willing to step or even lean against edges of my familiar zone?

For me, I’m more of a stepper than a leaner.  Once I make a decision to move, I generally go.  And right now that has looked like hiring a business coach to help me make some steps forward into being more visible in my practice.  It has meant creating a new web site to reflect the shifts in my business and asking for help in doing it. It means that I’m writing more blogs and communicating more with all of you on a regular basis.

And yes, there are times and days when it is uncomfortable to step out of the familiar. I find myself asking questions like:  What will people think?  Will they like what I write?  Am I writing it good enough?  Am I heading in the right directions?  Will this really work?

And what I’m discovering is that I’m learning all kinds of things about myself.  I’m learning where my edges are and how to work with them rather that trying to force things to happen.  I’m having numerous opportunities to begin to understand how to surrender and let go, allowing things to unfold because sometimes when I take the step, it is unclear how it will all come together in the end.  And I’ve found that when I try to force something to come together, it no longer is flowing and it gets stuck until I step back and let go.  The journey to there is an adventure in and of itself.

What about you?

What is your familiar zone?

Is it comfortable?

Are you willing to make a move toward some real comfort?

 

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Toxic Thoughts…….possibilities

May the final weeks of 2011 be exactly perfect in every way.

At times your idea of perfect might be different than what you get, which can be really interesting and even challenging.  What if you could drop into trusting that everything really is perfect and that each thing that doesn’t feel that great really is an opportunity to look at it from another place or to do it different somehow?

I know it can feel like a big stretch sometimes, though it can also turn a perceived disaster into mystical magic at times too.

I’ve noticed and experimented some with this over the years……how do I get through the holidays in a state of peaceful calm and joy?  After all, isn’t that what the season is all about?

 

New Possibilities

Here is an example of what I’m talking about.  You know all the amazing food and drink that seems to show up right now, and only once a year?

The temptations abound everywhere from the eggnog to the chocolates to the smoked applewood cheese and all the scrumptous dips and chips.  Parties, dinners and gatherings of all kinds abound along with all those goodies that often seem to show up for some of us on our hips by morning.

I used to find myself in constant judgment and negativity about all the toxins and bad stuff made with all the sugar, flour and alcohol connected with the season.  Lots of toxic thoughts about the toxic stuff and feeling really gross after certain parties and dinners.

Then I began to realize that maybe my thoughts are actually way more toxic than the food itself……mmmm.  And I began to question myself,  “What if I am grateful for that amazing piece of fudge I long for and eat it with full gratitude and attention as the delicious texture, flavor, aroma and sense of satisfaction my taste buds experience?”

Wow!  What a wonderful experience to simply enjoy the seasonal food and drinks knowing that this is the last time I’ll have it for another year.

My body feels so different when I eat the sugary cookies and candies this way.  In fact, sometimes I only want to eat one of the cookies because when I eat it in gratitude and awareness, that is all I need.  When I forget to do this, I often find myself eating numerous pieces and not feeling satisfied.

I invite you to explore if there is there any particular way you can shift your thinking about what you choose to eat or drink this holiday season?  How would it feel to shift into gratitude and awareness?  What do you think might change inside you?

Is there any other areas during the holidays where you might be able to shift your thinking into a place of gratitude and awareness?

You do have a choice in each and every situation to do it differently.  It can be easy to forget at times and I encourage you to allow yourself some space while you explore the options.

All the information and wisdom you need is within you.  I invite you to trust yourself and to use the challenges as opportunities to have a look and a listen to what other possibilities there might be.

 

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Don’t Believe Everything You Think

Last year a friend gave me a button that says “Don’t believe everything you think”.  I love this statement in so many ways.

Soon after I had it, I had an opportunity to put the statement into practice.  For years I felt drawn to attend a hot yoga class and yet I could never think of a way to actually make it happen. So I didn’t.

Until last year, after a repeat injury to my knee plus an additional injury to the other ankle.  Out of desperation to heal my body more quickly, I went to hot yoga.  It was hard. Super hard to begin with and I couldn’t do a lot of the poses very well at all, never mind all the sweat and toxins pouring out of my body (as well as everyone else in the class).

After the first few months and some improvements I found myself questioning my commitment to the practice.  Why was I here?  Was it because it seems the cool and sexy thing to do?  Or to prove something to someone?

Upon some reflection, I realized it wasn’t about committing to the practice. It was really about a commitment to myself and my wellbeing.

My thinking was trying to convince me it was about the practice, when the real heart issue for me was, ‘Am I willing to commit to my own healing in a way that would allow me to get stronger as well as to maintain my strength and flexibility?’

Wow!  What a different place to be coming from in my awareness.  Here was a real opportunity for me to make a real commitment to myself in a way I had never been able to do before.

Once I was able to get out of my thinking mind and into my feeling heart to see that it was about and for me and not about the practice, the real opportunity was clear.

I chose to make a real commitment to me and “I feel good……  ”

 

Self Inquiry

Have you noticed any times when you allow your own thinking to limit what you can do, create or accomplish?

Do you ever use money as an excuse to not do something for yourself that you would really benefit from?

Have you ever noticed any self sabotaging thoughts that keep you trapped, limited or small?

Is there anything that you’ve been wanting do or try that you haven’t done yet?  What is it that keeps you from doing it?

 

Stepping Forward

Would you be willing to “not believe everything you think” and step into your heart and inner knowing?

How can you step out of your thinking and into your knowingness and intuition TODAY?

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Experiencing Daily Challenges and Overwhelm

You know those days when you want to pull the covers over your head when the alarm goes off?  Or when you look at your schedule for the day or maybe for the week, and wonder how you will possibly make it through?  Or you’ve been awake since 3 am unable to fall back asleep until a few minutes before the alarm goes off?  We each have our own version of overwhelm and stress, though essentially they are all very much the same.

I find some days way more challenging for me than others.  At times there doesn’t even seem to be any particular reason that I’m feeling so off and other days it is totally obvious.  I find all of them difficult to accept and maneuver through.  The darker and colder days of fall tend to make those kind of days even harder for me.  I find myself wanting to fix it by hitting the rewind button and going back to another time or hitting the fast forward to a much more comfortable place and time.  Anything other than being here now.

 

Self Inquiry and Honesty

As soon as I am aware of what is happening to me (which sometimes takes a while), I often ask myself “What is the opportunity in this kind of place where I feel tired, grumpy and plain out of ‘the groove’?”   I’m pretty sure that many of you know what I’m talking about!

Honestly, this happens much more than I would like to admit.  How do I find my way through this kind of a day?

First, I have been learning and practicing to accept and allow what is really happening in this moment.  For example, when I find a way to settle down and be quiet, I say to myself, “This is where I am and I don’t really like it at all.”   I’ve learned that I benefit so much by first being honest with myself. 

Everyone else around me benefits too when I acknowledge and admit what is happening, as I am less likely to take out my frustrations on them.  Sometimes the very act of being honest with myself can change the entire experience and take the charge out of it completely or at least partially.

I continue by asking myself, “In what ways?”

“I feel tired, overwhelmed and that if I am asked to make another decision about anything I will burst into tears.” (and sometimes I do give myself permission to have a good cry, which often can help unload a lot of the stress and overwhelm)

Most importantly I remind myself to take a breath and breathe…..as many times as I can remember to do so…….

I keep asking questions until I get to the centre of things even if is only for a moment.  And then I ask myself if I can be willing to still love and accept myself even when I’m feeling all of this stuff.  I sometimes feel resistance to this entire concept and I notice that too.  I give myself the opportunity to feel the resistance and what it is about. When I can, I make a choice to allow the resistance to let go.  It can be pretty hard some times and that is okay too.

 

Narrowing Down the Focus

Then I narrow my focus down as much as I can given all of my circumstances and committments and figure out what absolutely has to get done and what can wait.  I’ve learned over time that there are usually a number of things that I was pressuring myself about and thought were absolute, that really can wait.  Then I figure out what I can do, however big or small, that would feel supportive of myself in this moment.

 

Supportive Ideas

On Sunday when we had no committments for the day and I was exhausted, I listened to and honored what my body was telling me.  I went back to sleep until 1:45 pm!!  I know, I amazed myself too!  And I felt way better when I did finally get out of bed.

On a week day when there are more plans, maybe it is a cup of tea and a book, or a hot bath in the middle of the day or at the end of the day.  One of my favorites and most useful activity is walking or simply being out in nature.  I find walking gives me the opportunity to move at whatever speed I am feeling and I almost always feel different by the end of the walk.

On the days when I only have short periods of time, I use those few minutes to meditate and centre again and I make a plan for how I can really nuture myself at the end of the day. There are times too when watching a movie or disappearing into a book is the right solution for me.  I get curious about what will feel the the most nurturing and supportive and I give myself permission to partake, knowing that this funky place too will shift.

The key is to find some way to honor and acknowledge whatever it is that you are experiencing with as much acceptance and compassion for yourself as you can find.  If you find this challenging, think of how you would support your own child or close friend in this kind of situation.  If this is unfamiliar and new to you, be curious as to what will feel the most supportive and nurturing for you.  It may be different at different times or it might be the same every time.

I’ve also learned that these kind of days do not last forever either!  Sometimes it is only a portion of a day and sometimes it will slowly shift so that by the end of the day you wonder what happened earlier.  And sometimes it will last longer.  Ask for help, talk with a close friend or whatever eases you in these times.  Be curious what it is that you can do for yourself that will be nurturing and support you the most and find ways to do it!  You are worth it!

 

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Filling Up……

My personal favorite places to refill are when I am out in nature.  I was blessed with a wonderful friend who has a truck and drove us to Carmanah in July, which is one of the oldest forests still remaining on the island.  (Traveling there by truck is most desirable as it is many hours on very rough logging roads.)

We spent a night and two days in the ancient forest.  It was truly magical in every way.  The energies, strength and power held and nurtured in the trees and all of the surrounding plants and animals are so rich and powerful in ways that words fall short of being able to totally convey the essence of “ancient”.  It is very special.

I have a very clear memory of sitting by the river and feeling such deep and profound peace, calm and contentment.  I was astounded by the feelings and marveled in them because I could not ever remember feeling this to such a depth in my soul.

The warmth of the sun and the gentle breeze on my skin, the sounds of the river, birds and breakfast being cooked and the crystal clarity that was in and around everything in my sight of vision that morning fills my heart and soul every time I remember this place and moment in time.  My tank was filling up fast and I felt renewed and refreshed in very deep ways.

There are so many things going on all around us these days to overwhelm and to deplete us and throw us off our center. 

Environmental disasters, political issues, family needs and unexpected surprises, job/work stuff, health issues of ourselves as well as those close to us, kids and all their needs as well as our own personal issues.  It can be pretty nonstop for days on end at times.

 

Self Inquiry

How are you taking care of you? What refills your tank?

Are you making sure that you are refilling yourself on a regular basis before the tank runs dry?  Who is going to meet your needs if you don’t?

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Creating Effortless Flow and Ease

Has anyone noticed an accelerated sense to life these days?

I sure have and am finding a real need and yearning to be quiet and simplify everything as much as possible.  There appears to be a significant amount of energies to process and integrate very quickly and it has the potential to make us feel overwhelmed much faster than in the past.  My understanding is that this will be continuing through until the end of October when another shift will take place.

If you are hoping it will settle down soon, please keep in mind this is an ongoing trend and the best way to work with these shifts are to assist your body and self to be able to integrate the shifts with ease and calm. 

Craniosacral Therapy can be the perfect way to assist you in finding your ideal way to move through all of these shifts very effortlessly.  It is so much easier to intergrate these energies when everything within us is flowing smoothly and in a connected way.

I invite you to give yourself permission for everything in your life to be easy and effortless, filled with peace and calm.  You deserve it!

With much love and light and looking forward to seeing you soon!

Cindy

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Some Thoughts About Perception….

I have been thinking about perceptions and how to simply demonstrate and discuss the concepts with clients and friends.  Bruce Lipton, MD, does an excellent job of discussing the biology of thought in his book, The Biology of Belief.  In his book he describes all his research and others to prove how powerful our thoughts are in our everyday life and why.

One way to play with the concept is to imagine that you have come into the world with one particular set of glasses that have been formed mainly during your childhood years, particularly from conception to age 7 or 8.  Everything that you experience or see is perceived through these same set of lenses~EVERYTHING!!

Have you ever wondered why similar events or situations continue to recur at times?  Or why you continue to draw the same sort of friends or partners into your life?  Or why it is so difficult to understand why someone said or did something that really triggered you or upset you?

Our lenses from childhood tend to be very black and white, good and bad, right and wrong….what if there were other possibilities?  What if you can consciously choose again?  That in and of itself could create huge life changes and much more peace and joy on a daily basis.

My suggestion is for starters, that you imagine that you can remove your original childhood glasses of perception…..and notice before you an entire array of other glasses you could put on…..for instance, the wide angle lenses where you can see that anything and everything is perfect and possible!  Next you might try on the fun and playful glasses to see what that is like….or maybe the adventure and exploration glasses…..or any other glasses that you see in front of you…..and maybe you might want to just not wear any at all and discover the peace, calm and quiet that may be there…….and for a contrast you might try the doom and gloom or grief and sadness glasses on…..

The main idea is to understand that you actually do have a choice about how you think and what you perceive every moment of every day!  The way to move toward this understanding is to become conscious about your thoughts….notice where they tend to go and when you can, choose again.

Life has the potential to be whatever it is you dream and imagine it to be!!!  Make the most of it and have as much fun and joy and peace as possible!!

Love, Light and Peace, Cindy

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Creating Balance

Many of us struggle with creating and maintaining balance in our lives.  We have so many opportunities to be busy and thinking about everything~from when to be where and how to fit that appointment into the schedule~ to how to manage and track all the paperwork/computer details of the day to day~to how to devote the time and energy into the relationships and activities that nuture and feed us the most~not to mention dealing with the relationships that challenge us the most!

Spending every moment of every day thinking is exhausting and very stressful over time.  Most illnesses today can be directly tracked back and have some kind of relationship to daily and long term stress.  So how do we develop different ways to move through our lives every day?  Where can we place our focus to help make things easier, more fluid and flowing?

One of the most simple and easy ways to begin is to focus on your breathing.  When you notice that situations and events are moving very quickly and you are feeling scattered, grumpy, and exhausted or tired, stop and focus on taking a big deep breath…..then another……and another.…..feel the air moving in and out of your body and allow your breathing to release the fatigue and scattered feelings.

Breathing is often the thing we first forget to do when the stress builds and yet it is the easiest and most simple way to relax.  Taking as few as one to four focused times to breath throughout the day will help substantially to decrease your body’s reaction to stress.  Taking the time to focus once an hour during the day to focus on breathing will help even more.

Another way is to tune into or focus on your heart space Our heart is much more powerful and all knowing than our mind.  We have been taught to be focused in our mind to move through all aspects of life.  This is often done to please others and to be noticed in attempts to feel loved and accepted.

When we live our lives guessing what the other person or people would like the most, we loose touch with who we really are and we often shut down our heart in order to avoid feeling hurt or pain.  We feel lost and are not even sure why.  When we are looking for acceptance from outside ourselves, we can feel like we are never enough for anyone or anything.

When we begin to look within and feel our own heart, to what is our own truth, to who we really are…..to see and recognize that peace comes from inside and only from inside…..we can then begin to discover who we are.  It becomes clearer and easier to recognize how we want to spend our time and energy.  Saying ‘no’ is easy when we know it is our truth. 

The more we can live our lives from our heart, which enables us to discover our authentic self, the easier life becomes and the more peace, love and joy we experience effortlessly.

May we all discover the balance of living life in peace, love and joy from within

February 7, 2010

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Allowing Triggers to Lead the Way to Possibilities

Here we are at the very beginning of a New Year!  The excitement and anticipation of beginning something new contains so many possibilities when we are open to seeing them.

I’ve been exploring the possibilities in being able to see the absolute perfection in every moment.  I was just reading Eckhart Tolle’s, A New Earth again this morning, which is such an great reminder of the power of being present and conscious in this exact moment.  All we have are moments each and every day.  The choice we have is where we place our thoughts and focus each and every moment.  When we focus on the past or the future we are missing this moment.

One of my biggest learning opportunities has been to recognize triggers, or things that upset me or grab my attention or focus, as learning opportunities.  These triggers are the gateway to healing the parts within that have yet to be healed inside of me.

When I am able to be conscious as the trigger is present, and to observe what I am doing with it, I am changing a deep and usually a very old pattern within me.  Perhaps it is an old defense mechanism that I developed in order to cope with hurt or pain that I experienced as a child.  By tracing my reaction back to another time or even to it’s place of origin in order to discover what the orginal hurt was, I have the opportunity to heal that place inside of me.  Triggers are the opportunities to heal deeply within. 

It can be a challenge initially to bring oneself into consciousness when this is happening.  I encourage you to find a place of being curious initially, and asking what could be the opportunity in this place?  It is deeply rewarding to persist and note that each time you do it, it is easier and requires less time to process.

Often it is another person who initiates the trigger, and in our confusion, we think it is about them.  Actually, they are the angel presenting the opportunity for us to heal the deep parts of us that are asking for healing.  Everything that happens to us is only about us.  We have invited all kinds of angels into our lives to help us heal deeply within, which in time will make it even easier to be present in this moment.

I will know I have healed deeply when I am at peace with everything that happens at every moment in my life.

My hope for us all this year is that we can embrace each and every moment as a gift….And that when we are triggered, that we can step into consciousness and see that moment as a healing opportunity….And that we are able to give thanks for every angel that presents us with the possibility to heal and discover the peace and joy that is already ours….

Namaste’,  Cindy

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